Oh you rascals. Hahaha. It seems that there is a parcel enroute to my address. No idea who it’s coming from, or even why. It’s not even my birthday.
Good folks at DHL are on the ball, and sending it to me. I am so excited! I wasn’t expecting a parcel. But they assure me it is coming. And SOON! Seven days! I can hardly contain myself. I’m just dying to find out what’s inside. It could be treasure! Or a pair of mismatched and poorly fitting mittens from Aunt Ann. She’s a sweetheart, but her eyesight’s going. You ought to see those knitting needles fly, though…
Oh, look the email that DHL sent me to advise that the mystery parcel is on its way has a handy attachment that contains “more information and the tracking number”. Well, I’ll be. That is so handy! Now why do you think they wouldn’t just put the tracking number into the email itself? Probably some pointy-haired manager made a policy decision before going for lunch. You know the type. “Security-minded”.
The attachment is a ZIP file, so it must be safe. I’ve received ZIP files from all over the place. That guy my sister married, what-his-face, the one in IT, he sends them over to me all the time. I should probably double click that file so I can see what’s inside of it. Maybe it has clues as to the contents and sender… It says DHL_Document.zip, so I’m pretty sure that must be what it is.
DHL is a big company. They are SO big in fact that they don’t just use names on their email addresses. Why, looking at this email, coming from firstname.lastname@example.org, they have to number their employees just to keep track of them! Imagine how many there must be if this came from number 61 in the support department.
DHL works so hard to get my parcels to me. FAST. They really should slow down though. Their sentence structure and grammar is terrible. I should reply to these nice folks, let them know I got their email, and thank them for being so considerate. Oh, look, there’s another one. And one from Purolator. Wow, and another one. I can’t wait to get all of these packages! Someone loves me. They really, really love me!!